Patriarchy Ends at the Cross (John 19:23-27)
Faithful at the Cross
John 19:23–27
23 When the soldiers crucified Jesus, they took his clothes, dividing them into four shares, one for each of them, with the undergarment remaining. This garment was seamless, woven in one piece from top to bottom.
24 “Let’s not tear it,” they said to one another. “Let’s decide by lot who will get it.”
This happened that the scripture might be fulfilled that said,
“They divided my clothes among them
and cast lots for my garment.”
So this is what the soldiers did.
25 Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. 26 When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to her, “Woman, here is your son,” 27 and to the disciple, “Here is your mother.” From that time on, this disciple took her into his home.
The Faithful Witnesses
When we read the Gospel stories about the death and resurrection of Jesus, one detail stands out across all four Gospels: the women are always there. They are present at nearly every moment of the story. They witness Jesus’ death, they watch where his body is buried, and they are the first ones to arrive at the tomb on Easter morning. The Gospels name several of them—Mary Magdalene, Joanna, Mary the mother of James, Salome, and others. These women are not background characters in the story. They are witnesses, disciples, and messengers of the resurrection. In fact, the first person to proclaim the Easter message is Mary Magdalene.
From the very beginning, the Christian message is carried by those whom society often overlooked.
John’s Gospel highlights something else about the crucifixion story. When Jesus is arrested in the garden, the male disciples scatter. Mark says plainly that they all deserted him and fled. Their disappearance does not necessarily mean they were cowards; a group of men associated with someone accused of rebellion would have been seen as dangerous and could easily have been arrested as well. Still, their absence leaves a striking picture at the cross.
John describes four Roman soldiers dividing Jesus’ clothing. At the same time, he names four women standing near the cross: Jesus’ mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. The empire trusts in soldiers armed with power and violence. The kingdom of God is represented by women who remain present in love and faithfulness.
The empire does not see these women as a threat. Their apparent powerlessness allows them to remain close to Jesus when others cannot. Yet in the Gospel story, their presence becomes a quiet testimony to a different kind of power. They remain when others flee. They watch. They remember. They become the first witnesses of resurrection.
A New Family
While hanging on the cross, Jesus looks down and sees his mother standing beside the disciple whom he loved. In that moment he says, “Woman, here is your son,” and to the disciple, “Here is your mother.” With these words, Jesus forms a new family. The early church often saw this moment as a symbol of the birth of the church itself. At the foot of the cross, a new kind of community begins to take shape—one built not on bloodlines or power but on love and shared responsibility.
Women played an extraordinary role in that early community. Many of the first house churches were led or hosted by women. Lydia, for example, hosted the church in her home in Philippi. Paul later spoke of women who “struggled beside me in the work of the gospel.” In Romans he greets Junia, whom he calls outstanding among the apostles. The early church grew not through domination but through networks of hospitality, courage, and faithfulness, many of which were sustained by women.
The story of the cross reminds us that the kingdom of God often grows in places the world overlooks. Empires trust in power, control, and strength. The Gospel shows a different way. Faithfulness, courage, and love—often carried by those with the least power—become the foundation of the church.
Even today, the church needs the voices, leadership, and gifts of women. Without them, we miss half the story. The cross itself shows us that God’s kingdom is not built by those who grasp for power but by those who remain present in love.
House Church Discussion Questions
1. When you picture the story of the cross and resurrection, what stands out to you about the women being present at so many key moments? Why do you think that matters?
2. The male disciples disappear during the crucifixion, but the women stay. What do you notice about that? Have you ever experienced someone simply staying with you during a hard moment?
3. In your experience, where have you seen women’s voices, leadership, or wisdom make the church healthier or stronger?
6. The empire trusted soldiers and power, but the Gospel highlights quiet faithfulness and love. What do you think this teaches us about the kind of strength that really matters in God’s kingdom?